Art by Uzlo: https://www.deviantart.com/uzlo

The old man returned a short time later and the two kobolds joined him on the walk back to the house, where they found Sigmundurr and Eilistraee sitting on the porch bench, swinging and talking quietly.

“Aye, all packed and ready to go so soon?” Sir Bart said as they approached, noticing the packs laid out beside the pair.

“I’m afraid we must,” Eilistraee said, rising from the bench. “These three still have a good way to travel before they reach the nearest village tavern.

“Well, it’s been a pleasure having you stay with me. Here, don’t leave just yet. I have a little something for you,” he said and scurried in the house to get something.

“I don’t think it’s been an hour, Sig,” Kreet said, unable to keep from giving him a little ribbing.

The big man leaned back on the bench, a smile coming over his face and closing his eyes as if in remembrance. “Turns out I’ve not got quite the stamina I thought I did.”

“Enough of that. What’s done is done. Water under the bridge,” Eilistraee said, and Kreet could swear she saw the goddess blush. “Now that’s unexpected!” she thought.

“Here you go,” the old man said as he bustled back out with three little packets. “One for each of you. My best leaves.”

“Oh, we can’t take from you!” Kreet said. “We should be paying you!”

“Nonsense. This isn’t payment. It’s advertisement!”

“What’s that?” Kallid asked, but still admiring Sigmundurr.

“I want you to share this tea with anyone else you meet. If you look inside, you’ll see I’ve put them inside little bags, and I wrote my name on each and every one of them! Then if somebody likes it enough, he’ll come find me and buy more!”

“Oh! I see!” Kallid said sincerely. “Do you sell a lot of tea?”

“Not a lot. Not yet,” said Sir Bart, and patted the kobold’s head. “But I hope to, with your help! I’m growing my biggest crop out back now, but I need customers. So you just share that tea with anyone who might want it, and who knows?”

“So,” Eilistraee interrupted as the others donned their packs, “The old knight becomes a merchant?”

He just shrugged. “About time I do something with this stuff. Besides, my daughter in law deserves something for all the help she does me, and I’ve not got much to give her when I’m gone. She’s a real pain in the ass sometimes, but she cares…”

Suddenly the old man drifted off for a moment, his eyes growing shiny. “She does care,” he concluded.

“Well, we’re ready to go,” Sigmundurr said. “Good luck old man, and thanks for the hospitality.”

“The pleasure was all mine. A good trip to you all!”

And with that, they all began back towards the road.

“Nice man,” Kallid said as he once again struggled to keep pace.

“Very nice,” Kreet agreed.

They turned back onto the road and started the last leg of their trip to the village. An hour later, Sigmundurr stopped unexpectedly.

“What is it, Sig?” Kreet asked.

“She’s gone.” he said, a clearly sad note in his voice.

“Who?” Kalled asked, catching up.

“Eilistraee,” Sigmundurr said, looking back at the way they’d come.

Suddenly Kreet’s eyes went wide. Eilistraee! How had she forgotten the goddess so soon? By the look on Kallid’s face, he was going through the same thoughts.

“Don’t feel bad, Kreet. I’d forgotten her too for a moment. But only for a moment. I think she did that on purpose, so she could leave without a long goodbye.”

“Probably,” Kreet agreed.

Sigmundurr looked up at the moon and smiled. Had he seen something there? But instantly he turned back to Kallid.

“Look, little man, I’ve not gotten any real exercise for days and I’m getting flabby. My legs are great but I need to carry more than this little pack. Would you mind riding on my shoulders for a while?”

Kallid’s look brightened considerably and in a moment he was happily riding astride Sigmundurr’s shoulders. Kreet couldn’t deny that they were making better time too.

“So… what was it like?” Kallid was asking Sigmundurr. “I mean, an actual goddess!”

“Oh, it was like nothing you could imagine, little man. She was as light as a feather and as solid as a rock when you wanted her to be! But… it’s not all it’s cracked up to be.”

“No? I would have thought…” Kallid started, but Kreet shot him a look.

“What?” Kallid asked her.

“I’m married to you for one day… Pregnant with your damn babies no less, and you’re already asking about other girls!?!”

“But, Kreet… A goddess.”

“Hmpf. Seems to me you should be more interested in scales than in dark skin and hair anyway.”

“Kreet, don’t be like that! Aren’t you even curious?”

“Not in the least,” she lied, and convincingly so.

“Five minutes at best,” Sigmundurr said, interrupting the two.

“What?”

“Kallid, it lasted 5 minutes and I was done. Kaput. Finished.”

“Is… Is that supposed to be short?”

“Yes Kallid. I used to be able to go for hours on end! Why? Is that not…”

Kreet saw her chance and she took it. “5 minutes would be like a love marathon.”

Kalled looked hurt, but didn’t argue. “Yeah…” he admitted. “I don’t last very long. Still, that must have been some 5 minutes?”

“Best 5 minutes of my life,” Sigmundurr said wistfully and his gaze strayed to the moon yet again. “Miss you already Eil!”

“Sorry Kallid,” Kreet said. “I’m sorry. I was being hurtful. I shouldn’t do that.”

“Hurtful? How?”

“About the whole… you know. Lovemaking thing. You’re fine. Best I ever had, I can honestly say. And I expect that’s probably about normal for us anyway.”

“You say that because I’m the only one you’ve ever had.”

“Doesn’t make it less true!”

Kallid considered this as he bounced down the road atop Sigmundurr’s shoulders. “I guess you’re right!” he decided.

“Say,” Sigmundurr said. “Aren’t there any kobold gods or goddesses? I never thought about it before, but all the major races have their own.

“There’s Kurtulmak,” Kreet said, now on familiar ground. She’s studied a lot about gods and goddesses at the monastery. It wasn’t just a class or two, it was a whole school of study!

“Kurtlemak?” Kallid asked.

“There, see? Exactly. We don’t really go in for god worship much. Now I could talk about dragon worship. That’s a thing. But gods… we tend to just try to stay out of their way mostly.”

“I see,” Sigmundurr said. “Too bad. You should get yourself a nice female kobold goddess.”

“Got one!” Kallid replied and Kreet eyed him, trying her best not to smile.

“Flattery. You’re going to have to do better than that, Kallid,” she said, not letting go of the meager scrap of jealousy she still retained.

They continued down the trail until the lights of a small town were seen in the distance. Kreet estimated it should be around midnight, so the tavern should be just getting boisterous about now.

“That must be the place,” Kallid said.

Sigmundurr replied, looking up at his rider, “Yup. The old man says it’s ‘Tula’.”

“‘Tula’? Never heard of it,” Kreet said, looking up at the man beside her. “You?”

He shook his head. “Never. But we should be able to get our bearings once there. Somebody’s got to have been to a bigger city I’ve heard of!” “Which reminds me… Kallid, how’s your vision doing? It’s not going to be dark inside there in the morning.”

“Oh, I think I’m ready for it. I went out this morning in full daylight to pee and it was okay in the shade. Well, with my sunglasses on at least.”

Kreet nodded. “I’m getting used to it again too. I think we’ll do okay Sig. I don’t really even need my sunglasses anymore except in full daylight, and I’ve always needed it for that.”

“Well good. But a word of warning. These people aren’t going to be used to kobolds strolling in out of the dark. Stay close to me until we can see what we’re dealing with, okay?”

Both the kobolds agreed as they passed into the village proper.

Art by licarto: https://www.deviantart.com/licarto

Kreet nodded, and she did feel reassured. Scared, still, but better. Yet this was what she wanted, wasn’t it? What she’d wanted for years in fact. But now that she was staring her future full in the face, it scared her. Still, she supposed, it would probably scare any first-time mother. From what she knew, at least she took some comfort in the simple fact that birthing for kobolds was likely a lot easier than that of humans. The hips that had flared out under her waist and caused her such embarrassment when she had crossed puberty now gave her some assurance that, indeed, she was designed for this.

And two of them – that wasn’t so bad. Kobolds were known to give birth to a lot more than two on occasion. She had been born without any twins, herself, but all three of her older brothers had been born at once.

In her native kobold language, ‘hatched’ was a perfectly acceptable term, but she had been speaking in the human tongue for so long now it just didn’t feel right. She didn’t like to think of her children as being ‘hatched’. At least she didn’t have to pass gangly elbows and knobby knees, not to mention the umbilical cord and placenta that humans had to endure. Eggs might seem animalistic to humans, but frankly she was quite happy that her babies would be born in nice, compact and best-of-all, smooth format!

But still… how on earth could she ever… so big. She closed her eyes and felt the rocking of the bench. Somehow, she would manage. The goddess had said so.

And then she felt the hand of the goddess on her again.

“Kreet? You’re sleeping. Why don’t you go in to Kallid?”

Groggily she nodded and stepped off the bench.

“I think I’ll head in too,” Sigmundurr said, yawning widely.  “Good day Eilistraee. And Sir Bart.”

The old man waved his pipe in acknowledgement. “Well, Eilistraee,” he smiled to the goddess. “Want to take a stroll with me around the place?”

“That sounds like a fine idea, Sir Bart. Sig, Kreet, I’ll join you a little later.”

And with that, Sigmundurr held the door for Kreet into the dark interior of the house. She looked at the incongruous sight of an old man and a beautiful naked drow goddess strolling through the sun-dappled grass, hand in hand.

Kreet smiled at her snoring husband when she entered the little bedroom. It was a cute sound, more of a rumble than Sigmundurr’s loud cacophony. She snuggled under the blanket beside him and he stirred, and pulled her hand around himself.

She heard Sigmundurr climb into the small bed and wondered for a moment where Eilistraee was going to sleep, but realized the goddess probably wouldn’t sleep at all anyway. Instead she felt the vibrations of her husband’s breathing and she laid her snout on top of his shoulder. Pregnant she may be, but this was nice. She realized she was falling in love, if a little belatedly, with her children’s father. He might be smaller than her, but he had a good heart. That meant a lot. And then all was darkness and warmth and she didn’t dream.

Hours later she felt Kallid stir behind her and get up out of bed. Vaguely she heard him emit a little squeak and she turned to look at him, but he shook his head, indicating it was nothing and he went out of the room, carrying his sunglasses with him.

He returned a few minutes later, and she went back to sleep. She awoke to her husband waking her in a very intimate way.

“Kallid,” she whispered. “Not here!”

Her husband giggled and turned himself back around from his rather unusual position.

“Okay,” he whispered. “But come look!”

Kreet rubbed the sleep from her eyes and stood up, looking at where Kallid was pointing with a ridiculous grin on his face.

In the small bed, Sigmundurr continued to snore loudly, but underneath the blanket with him, the goddess lay with her head across his chest, apparently sleeping too.

Kreet’s eyes went wide. “Do you think?”

Kallid shrugged, but took her by the hand and led her out into the main room. The old man was nowhere to be seen.

“I don’t get it. Eilistraee didn’t even like him! Now she’s sleeping with him?” Kreet said quietly to Kallid in the kobold language.

“You think goddesses even… do that?”

“No idea. I guess they can, if they want, right? I mean, she eats and drinks with us.”

Kallid shrugged.

“Wait. They couldn’t have. I mean, I don’t know for sure, but something tells me Sigmundurr would be… loud.”

Kallid nodded. “True. I doubt we would sleep through anything like that.”

Kreet considered further though, “Then again, Eilistraee could… make us not hear if she wanted to. But no, I don’t think so. She sure is being awfully chummy with him though, isn’t she? Why?”

“I’m working on him, Kreet,” Eilistraee said, walking into the room and speaking in perfect kobold.

Kallid giggled and Kreet gave him a look before turning back to the goddess who sat beside them.

“You, might want to clarify that a little,” Kreet said.

“You know his nature, Kreet. While not evil, Sigmundurr is a violent man. And very headstrong. Not unlike some drow in many ways.”

“You’re changing his nature?” Kreet asked. “I don’t know if… It doesn’t sound right.”

“Not through any means you might think. That would prove nothing if I just changed him like that. I have to work through experience on him. I am trying to show him that gentleness has its merits too. And I think it’s working.”

“But, I thought you didn’t like him.”

“I didn’t say that, Kreet. I said you’d regret bringing him with you. And you will. But you said it yourself. Chaos, rage, anger. They have their place too. They just need to be moderated. I’m trying to provide that. And I think he’s beginning to see it too.”

Kallid had to ask the question that both the kobolds were wondering. “Did you… you know… “

The dark woman smiled and raised an eyebrow.

“That, little kobold, is not for you to be concerned about. But you are a curious race. No. Not that I haven’t considered it, but that would be too much, I think. Mortals are tricky in that regard. It’s far from unheard of, you know. Some gods play with mortals all the time – almost always to the mortal’s regret. But there is something in you mortals that make so much more of it than just a fling, especially when it’s with one of us. Then we get a simpering worshiper that often has lost all the qualities that we liked in the first place. In the case of Sigmundurr, that would be like castrating a dog. I don’t want that. I am attracted to him – yes, even we gods can fall in love. And lust. But I don’t want to change him that much. I just want to… gentle him a little.”

“I think it’s working,” Kreet nodded. “He’s different.”

“I know. But I have little time left, I’m afraid. Tonight you’ll reach the village, and I can no longer travel with you.”

“Aww,” Kallid said, his eyes turning mournfully dark. Kreet felt hers do the same. “You’re leaving us?”

Eilistraee held his head in her hands. “Yes, Kallid. It’s one thing for me to be seen strolling around in the countryside. But quite another to be seen in a village. It could be done, but it would alter things too much. No, my time with you is nearly over – at least for now. But I’ll see you again, I promise.”

Turning to Kreet, she laid a hand on her belly and smiled genuinely. “I’ll see you before these arrive, Kreet. Oh they’re going to be something, Kreet. These two are going to be… something.”

Kreet looked at Kallid.

“Your babies, Kallid.”

Suddenly he realized what they were talking about.

“Not the quickest kobold, is he?” Eilistraee laughed.

“No,” Kreet agreed as she took her husband’s and and put it on her belly with Eilistraee’s. “Not the quickest. Just the best.”

“We’ll miss you,” Kallid said when he managed to move his deep-red eyes away from Kreet.

“I know,” Eilistraee said, and stood up from the couch where they had been sitting. “And I’ll miss you too. Even you, little father. But it’s time for your lives to get back to normal. You’ll think back to these days like you were under an enchantment. Maybe you were. But you need to go back to getting scratches, and bug bites, and hunger and thirst. I’ll be watching though. I won’t be your protector, but I will be watching. Sorry, no, I won’t come when you call for me. It doesn’t work like that. You need to live your lives, and all won’t be rosy. That’s life.”

Kreet inhaled deeply, knowing the truth behind her words. “Back to life,” she said exhaling.

“Yes. back to life. Speaking of which…” said the drow goddess, turning towards the doorway to the bedroom.

Sigmundurr was stirring, and in a minute he stood in the doorway, blanket wrapped around himself. He was looking confused. The two kobolds got off the couch as Eilistraee motioned for him to sit beside her.

“Sorry Sigmundurr,” she said. “That was probably too bold of me. Please, don’t read too much into it.”

“Oh, of course not!” he laughed, and slapped her leg which startled even the goddess. “Why, I sleep with goddesses all the time. If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that you always wake up with the worst breath!”

“What?” Eilistraee said, shocked. “What do you mean? My breath is…”

“It’s beautiful, of course”, said the big man, and kissed her full on the mouth.

It may have been the first time Kreet realized that the goddess could be surprised, and by the look on Kallid’s face when Kreet turned to him, she saw the same look there.

“Sigmundurr!” Eilistraee shouted, bolting from the couch. “Really! This is too much. I’m sorry I even…”

“You’re leaving us tonight, aren’t you,” he stated, not really a question.

“Well, yes. I have to.”

“Where’s the old man?”

“He’s just out down the road visiting a neighbor a few miles away. He’s fine. But really, about your…”

Sigmundurr held up a finger, which oddly worked to shush the goddess.

“And what time is it outside? Is it dark yet?”

“Almost, but what on earth do you think gives you the right to…”

“Kreet, would you mind if you and Kallid go out and check on the cats for a while?”

“The cats? What’s…” Kallid began, but Kreet took his hand and filled it with his sunglasses.

“About an hour’s worth of checking should be fine,” Sigmundurr said as he took Eilistraee’s hand. She didn’t pull it away.

Kreet and Kallid stepped through the door into dusk. Fireflies were just coming to life and they saw no cats.

The house was a small one, and not well insulated. Kallid and Kreet had to stroll quite a way down the path that led to it before they were sufficiently out of earshot of the other two. And Sigmundurr wasn’t the only voice they heard, though the mortal and the goddess weren’t talking.

“Think he’ll be alright?” Kallid asked as the two stopped to skip some stones across a small pond beside the path.

“Who knows? But I don’t picture that man ever becoming some sort of lapdog either, goddess or no.”

The path joined with another, larger and more worn that could truly be called a road, though by the time they reached it, it was deserted. They passed their first remote farmstead, the house far from the road and invisible behind the woods, but they could hear the occasional bark of a large dog.

“I grew up on a farmstead like that,” Sigmundurr said, breaking the silence that had come over them. “Rough life. You’ve gotta be tough way out here. Need a real pioneer spirit to live at the end of the line.”

Kreet smiled at that. “Or you really don’t like other people a lot!”

“That too,” Sigmundurr agreed, not realizing it was intended as a joke.

“You were a farmer? I don’t picture that,” Eilistrae picked up the conversation.

“Not really. Dad was. He kicked me out. Deserved it though. I sucked as a farmer. My brothers were a lot better than me. Hell, my sister was better than me. Plus I kept running off to the tavern and coming back drunk. And… not alone.”

“Oh! Were you popular with women when you were young?” Kallid asked.

“Whaddaya mean when I was young?! I’m still young!”

“I… mean, when you were living with your dad.” Kallid countered quickly.

“Oh. Well, no. Not really. I had to pay em.”

“Whores? Your mom and dad didn’t mind?”

“Mom ran off after I was born. Never knew her. Just Dad. I don’t think he minded that so much. Heck, he brought some home sometimes himself. But he didn’t care for me straying out of my race. I liked the exotics. One morning he caught me with a cat girl and booted me out.”

“What, is he racist or something?” asked Kreet.

“Oh, probably. But it was the best thing for me. I hooked up with some adventuring fellas and never looked back. Turns out I made a pretty good figher.”

The trees became sparser as the road continued, and farmsteads became more numerous. They met their first fellow traveler, though he was drunk and sleeping it off by the side of the road. He woke at the sound of their approach, but just gaped at them the four walked by.

“Good evening,” Kreet said, bowing to him as they passed.

“E…evening,” he managed.

Otherwise the evening was theirs to traverse in peace. They had covered many miles, with not too many stops, when Kreet asked the question Kallid had whispered to her a short time before.

“Hey, Eilistrae. Do you have any ideas on where we should stop before morning yet? Kallid’s not really ready for full daylight yet.”

She looked at the kobold, valiantly managing to stay up with the others, though the stress was beginning to show. Kreet had been travelling with ‘big folk’ for most of her life and her legs had become accustomed to a quicker gait, plus she was at least somewhat larger than Kallid which also helped in that regard.

“I do, in fact,” Eilistrae assured them. “There’s an old widower, lives not far from the road just a bit farther ahead. I think he would be happy for the company. His caretaker has left him for a day so he’s all alone. In fact, I think I’ll join you this time.”

“Oh! Even in the day?”

“I’ll help keep the house dark. Kallid won’t have any problem. Sound good?”

Sigmundurr laughed, “Sounds good Eilistrae. Do we have a choice?”

True to her word, they turned off the road and down a winding cart-path until they came to a small, poor but well-kept house. A light was on inside. A single candle could be seen moving around inside. As the approached, they could hear humming.

Sigmundurr knocked at the door. The man within was wearing an old frayed robe and was apparently going about his morning breakfast ritual.

Eilistrae whispered, “He’s a little hard-of-hearing Sig. Bang harder.”

He did so, and the old man finally took notice.

“Who’s here at this hour?” he asked, approaching with his candle held high.

“Just some travelers, seeking some shelter for the day.”

“Travelers eh? I’m just an old man. I’ve got nothing worth stealing.”

“Hey,” Sigmundurr pointed out, “We did knock! Thieves wouldn’t do that.”

“No… no they wouldn’t.  Well come on in. Let’s see what we’ve got here…”

“Oh my!!!” he cried when Eilistraee made her entrance behind Sigmundurr, “Well aren’t you a Beauty!”

“Thank you, Sir Bart.”

“Well sit your pretty self down over there on the couch. My, this is turning into quite a morning! And a couple of little kobolds too? What are you two doing out of your caves?”

“Thank you for your hospitality,” Kreet said, and he nodded back to her, then poked his head looking around outside for more.

“And polite ones at that! That all of you?”

“That’s all,” Sigmundurr said. “Sorry for the imposition, but the kobolds like to travel at night and there’s really no where else to stay before morning.”

“Oh, hell. No problem. But lady, how do you know my name? I don’t even go by that anymore. You one of those mages? Never liked em.”

“Something like that, Sir Bart.”

“You want some clothes or something? I’m making some tea. I can add more.”

“Thanks,” Eilistraee replied sweetly. “But I’m more comfortable like this.”

“What’s ‘tea’?” Kallid asked, brightening up now that he could rest a little.

“‘What’s tea?’ Why, young feller, it’s only the best drink in the world. Well, without alcohol in it. Can’t drink the good stuff anymore. Wynda – she’s my boy’s wife. Comes by to take care of me. Anyway, she says I’ll die if I drink the good stuff again.  Probably right.”

The old man left the room into another, presumably a kitchen, but the open space between the rooms in the little house allowed for the conversation to continue.

“So you live here alone?” Kreet asked.

“My, but you talk well for a kobold! Oh no. Got my cats. Not much for conversation, but I like ‘em. Don’t worry, I don’t let em in. Knew a girl once. Real cat lover. Lived for em. House smelled like cat piss. Oh it was awful.”

“I hope we’re not too much of an imposition anyway,” Kreet continued.

The old man, Sir Bart, returned and sat in an old overstuffed and worn chair slowly. “Got more water on the boil. Oh, you’re no imposition at all. Not much happens in my life anymore, you know. Basically just sit around and wait for Old Bones to arrive. Glad to have the company. So what brings you here? I assume by the kobolds you’re coming up from the Drow caves?”

Sigmundurr nodded. “Yup. This is Kreet. She was raised by humans up top. We’re looking for her home. She sorta got lost. That other kobold she’s all touchy-feely with is her husband, Kallid. And he is just out of the caves but wanted to come along. I’m Sigmundurr. Just kinda along for the ride. And this here…”

As he turned to the goddess, she rose and crossed over to the old man.

“This is the goddess Eilistraee.”

“A goddess? In my house?”

“Pleased to meet you, Sir Bart. We met once before. Long ago. You killed quite a few of my drow as I recall. Well, perhaps ‘met’ is too strong. I became aware of you.”

The old man’s eyes grew wide.

“Relax, Sir Bart. You were justified. I’m not here to take your soul.”

“Eilistraee. Can’t say I remember the name, honestly. But I’m honored you would come to my door! A goddess. Wynda will never believe this!”

Eilistraee took his hand. “No, she won’t. Maybe we could just keep it a secret? She’ll think you’re going senile.”

“I am you know.” he said, looking forlorn into the goddess’ eyes.

“You are what?” Kallid asked, interested.

“Senile. I can’t remember things. Little things now, but it’s getting worse. And I forget where I am. Sometimes I think I’m back… I’m going senile.”

“You are,” Eilistraee said, sitting beside him and stroking his head. “It is a sad thing, but it is the way of life, you know. You must make room for the new ones coming up. But you’ll not be senile while I am in your house, Sir Bart.”

“No. I’m not right now, am I? I can tell.”

“If you’d like, Sir Bart… I can call him. I can call Old Bones to come and fetch you after we leave. Would you prefer that?”

The old man’s eyes began to tear up. “It’s a temptation, to be sure.” he said, and he ran his own hand down the goddess’ flank as if oblivious to just who it was he was groping. “But even when senile, I can still appreciate beauty. I don’t want to leave yet. Not quite yet. I might just have a use still in this world.”

Kreet was a little surprised the goddess allowed such familiarity, but she hugged him to her instead and kissed his forehead before rising. He ran his fingers across her back and bottom as she walked back to sit beside Sigmundurr.

“Yes, you might at that, Sir Bart. I am sorry for your affliction”

“Could you cure it?” Kreet asked.

A scream came then from the other room causing Kallid to jump up, alarmed.

“What’s that?!” he shouted, worried.

“Oh, relax little kobold. It’s just the water for the tea. I’ll be right back.”

“I could, Kreet.” Eilistraee admitted to Kreet. “But then a worse affliction would follow. Senility is a terrible disease, it’s true. His daughter-in-law sees it and it breaks her heart as he is slowly lost. But the alternatives are worse. You all must die, Kreet. There is no good death, despite what the novelists would have you believe. No one dies peacefully in their sleep. They die choking or gasping for breath or worse. Life doesn’t like giving up. Nature and Fate have decreed this is to be his end. It’s not such a bad end, as such things go.”

Sir Bart returned with two cups of tea, and Eilistraee rose to help him, taking them and distributing them to the kobolds.

“No, it’s not so bad,” he said, returning to the kitchen where Eilistraee followed to help. They returned with three more cups, Eilistraee handing one to Sigmundurr and taking the other for herself as she sat back down while the old man eased himself back into his old chair.

“It’s not like I haven’t thought about it,” he said, then a thought came to him. “Oh! I’m sorry, Eilistraee. I guess you don’t really drink!”

“I can. Or not. But as long as I’m here among you mortals, I’m happy to.”

“Well, then I hope you like it! My own special blend.”

They stopped talking for a moment while they sipped at their tea.

“Very hot,” Kreet whispered to Kallid. “Let it cool down first. Will burn your mouth.” So the two kobolds just blew on the top of their cups to cool it.

“Wow!” Sigmundurr said, after having taken a sip. “That’s actually pretty good. And I don’t like tea!”

“Why thank you. Since I retired here, I’ve been growing and refining tea in a little garden out back. You’re drinking years of refining and blending of different varieties.”

“Sir Bart’s Best!” Sigmundurr named it.

“Indeed, it is. I’m glad you like it. But, hey, I’m keeping you. The sun should be coming up soon. Wait… it should already be up! Strange.”

“Oh, sorry. I should have warned you. I’m doing that, Sir Bart,” Eilistraee confessed. “If you step outside it will be morning as you know it. But the light is still tough on little Kallid here.”

“A goddess. Strange. Should I be, I don’t know, kneeling or something?”

“Probably. But don’t. I’m suppressing that anyway. No, just treat me like a mortal.”

“If I were to treat you like a mortal, you might not like it!” the old man leered.

“You get used to it… somewhat,” Sigmunder laughed, understanding completely.

After their tea, the old man suggested they go out and sit on the porch. Kallid admitted to being tired anyway, so he went back to the bedroom. It was a small room with only the one bed. After some quiet discussion, the kobolds decided to make a bed on the floor at the foot of the bed instead, leaving the bed to Sigmundurr.

“Or Eilistraee. If she’s really going to stay with us all day.”

“Let’s let them figure that out,” Kreet replied. “Are you sure Kallid? I can just sleep here beside you. I’m tired too.”

“No, you go on with them. I’ll be fine. Just wake me when you get back.”

“I will,” Kreet said and nuzzled her mate before stepping back to the common room, donning her ‘sunglasses’, and opening the door to the porch.

She shielded her eyes reflexively as the light from the sun could be seen peeking through the trees to the east. But she recovered quickly. The old man was rocking slowly on a chair with a curved bottom, while Sigmundurr and Eilistraee sat on a bench tied to the roof with rope, slowly swaying back and forth while watching a cat fumble with a moth some ways off.

Eilistraee patted the bench on the other side of her, inviting Kreet to sit there, so she did so. Her legs couldn’t reach the porch, but Sigmundurr started the bench to swinging again.

“Pity,” the old man was saying. “Sunrise is the most beautiful time of day.”

“You okay with being out in the daylight, Eilistraee?” Sigmundurr asked the goddess.

“Fine. It’s not my domain, and we gods try to keep out of each other’s way. But Pelor is happy with me for helping Kreet out, so I’m good. Sorry, Kreet, I was just telling Sir Bart that I don’t get to see the sun rise very much. It really is gorgeous.”

The old man was smoking a long pipe he had presumably lit from the kitchen stove. Kreet watched in fascination as he blew smoke rings while they watched.

“This reminds me of a my adopted father, long ago,” she said after a time of silence. “My first human. We used to sit on his porch too. Watching his cat. Evenings though. We slept in the mornings.”

“Sunset’s are fine too,” Sir Bart said between puffs. “But they always reminded me of the end of things. Sunrise is the beginning. Beginnings are nicer.”

“Speaking of which,” Eilistraee said, and Kreet felt the godess’ cool hand on her shoulder. It felt very nice. It’s good to have a friend who’s a goddess, she thought.

Then suddenly she connected what Eilistraee was implying. She looked up at the dark face in alarm.

“I’m….?”

“Two in fact. Yes, Kreet.”

“Two! Are they…”

“Tsk tsk tsk, impatient kobold. You’ll have to wait and see.”

The old man looked at them, confused.

“She’s pregnant,” Eilistraee explained. “Got two little buns in her oven.”

“Oh! That’s wonderful! Congratulations Kreet!”

“Thank you! I guess! But that means… Oh my god. The sand begins to run through the hourglass!”

Eilistraee’s face turned a bit more serious, but the smile was still there. “Yes Kreet. You have about 6 months to find your home – or make a new one for yourself.”

“Eilistraee! I have no idea how to… do this! I read some books, but they were by humans. They didn’t talk about birth! Or how to raise babies!”

She felt the cool hand stroke her and her initial panic passed as the goddess’s words of comfort calmed her. “Relax, Kreet. Your body knows how to do what it needs to do. I’m afraid as a goddess, I can’t provide much advice. And these men are even worse, so don’t look to them. Kallid will help for support, but he won’t know anything either. You’re best off to find another female friend. A mother. These men only know how to plant it. Nurturing and harvesting isn’t their forte. Just do your best. You will do fine.”

Kreet looked into the eyes of the goddess, fear apparent. Deep down, she knew she wanted this, but now that it was confirmed, she was right back with the fear she’d had at first.

“Kreet, Take comfort in that. This is coming from a goddess who knows. You WILL do fine.”

Sunglasses-bold from https://www.weasyl.com/~bludragoon/submissions/180869/have-you-seen-this-kobold

Kreet awoke to the moaning of Kallid.

He was turned away from her, sitting facing the wall with his hands on his head.

“Kallid! What is it? What’s wrong?”

“I have a headache. Kreet, it hurts!”

“Did you hurt yourself or something? Did you eat something maybe?”

“No. It’s the light. I was alright for awhile but… it never stops. Oh Kreet, I don’t think I can do this!”

Kreet fumbled through her inventory and took out one of the pair of sunglasses she’d made.

“Here. Put these on.”

Kallid took them and fitted them to his head, pulling the dark cloth at the sides down to cover light leaching in from there and wrapping the woven stretchy loops around his horns. Then he went back to moaning and rocking on his haunches.

In the meantime, Kreet wove a light healing spell around him, hoping it would help ease the sensory overload his eyes were delivering.  While it was comparatively dark here, it was probably lighter than the kobold had ever experienced for a long period.

“I’m sorry Kreet,” he said, turning to her and she stifled a giggle at the rather ridiculous looking face in front of her. But he was sincere and suffering.

“Don’t worry too much, Kallid. We’ll just stay here till until nightfall, okay? Is that any better?”

“I think so.”

“Maybe Eilistraee can do something later. Just lay back down for a little bit. I’ll get some food.”

“Food would be good,” he smiled wanly.

Kreet rose and walked around to where Sigmundurr was still snoring. She touched him lightly but there was no change. She shook him more firmly. “Sigmundurr. Wake up.”

Sigmundurr said, “HNNNNGGG.”

“SIG!” she shouted and shook him with all her force.

“Hmm? Oh! Kreet. It’s you. Is it time to get up already?”

“Yes. I think so. We’re hungry. You got any food in your inventory?”

The big man sat up, rubbing his eyes. He looked outside. Though full daylight, the shadows did indicate it was approaching night again already.

“Food? Oh, sure! Do you want me to cook or something quick?”

“Oh good! I didn’t remember to ask you to take food with us, but I was hoping…”

“Kreet, I’m an adventurer. You don’t need to remind me to bring food. You might want to think about such things yourself more.”

“Can we get both then? Kallid’s not feeling well. The light, you know. I’m pretty used to it, but it will take him a while to adjust. I thought maybe something to distract him.”

Sigmundur brought out some dried fruit and nuts, then went out to get wood for a small fire while Kreet brought the food back to Kallid.

“Got any mushrooms?” he asked, greedily scarfing down the offering.

“Let me look around you pig,” she laughed and set about searching the cave. She found a few, but it should be enough.  Before going back to Kallid, Sigmundurr returned and started a small fire near the entry.

“Thanks Kreet,” Kallid said when she got back.  “I’m feeling a little better. Sorry for eating everything. I didn’t save anything for you. I’m… not used to being married I guess.”

“Oh, don’t worry about it. Sig’s going to be cooking something, and knowing him there’ll be plenty for all of us.”

Suddenly Kallid looked up. She couldn’t see his eyes, but he seemed suddenly worried about something.

“What is it?”

“I… um. I have to go.”

“Go where?”

“No. I have to GO.”

“Oh!” Kreet said, understanding at last. “Well, I guess you could just… go over there.”

“Kreet! What kind of kobold do you think I am? Besides, this is the first place we ever slept after we got married. It’s like our honeymoon cave! I don’t want to piss in it!”

“Well, it’s either that or brave the full daylight outside. You think you’re up for it?”

“I’ll have to be! But I think this is working pretty good.”

Kreet put on her own glasses and went outside with Kallid. He didn’t complain at the light, though they stuck to the shade of the nearby trees as much as they could, and the sun was just about to set.

“Still okay?” Kreet asked.

“Yeah! I’m fine! But… would you mind turning around?”

“Why? We’re married now.”

“I’m shy. Please?”

“Well, okay.”

When they returned, Sig was cooking some eggs and some sort of meat over the fire he’d built.

“Wow! Sig, that smells awesome!”

“Best cook in the wild. Got some eggs and pork belly. Should be done in just a few minutes. You okay Kallid?”

“Yes! These glasses work great!”

“I hope so. You look ridiculous. What were you to doing out there?”

“Pissing,” Kallid answered, then apologized for the vulgarity.

“Kallid, you don’t need to apologize,” Kreet said.

“Why?” Sigmundurr asked, flipping some eggs over. “I just went over in that corner.”

Kallid looked at Kreet. “Oh well,” she said. “So much for our honeymoon suite.”

However, when the breakfast was served, all was forgiven.

“Sigmundurr, this is great stuff!” Kreet said, wolfing down another egg. “What’s in it?”

“Oh, just some spices I keep around. It is good though, isn’t it?”

Kallid just nodded, his mouth full of potato.

When finally they were finished, they gathered up everything. Outside the sky was clear and the stars were beginning to show.

“I guess we’ll start without Eilistraee,” Sigmundurr said, and they walked back they way they’d come. They weren’t far from the path, and they started down it again.

Kreet removed her glasses and put them away, but suggested Kallid keep his on for a little longer. But he decided to take them off anyway.

“I need to get used to it eventually, Kreet. It’s not too bad now anyway.”

“That’s probably right. I was taken out of my home caverns when I was little, so I got used to it pretty quick.”

“STOP!” said a voice suddenly and unexpectedly from just ahead.  Three armed men stepped from behind trees on their right and left. Sigmundurr smiled and pulled out his sword.

Kreet heard something behind her and she turned around to see three more. They did not look friendly.

“What have we here?” said another of the men in front. “A fat man and a couple of kobolds? Slim pickings I say.”

“Lucky to get 2 gold off them. Not worth it I say,” said another.

Sigmundurr laughed at that.

“I’ve got over 700, if you gents would like to try and get it!” he said, and Kreet stared at him horrified.

“Bullshit,” said the first. “You look like you ate it all if ever you had any!”

That set the others laughing, but they didn’t approach any closer.

“Funny man,” Sigmundurr said, obviously itching for a fight.

“What, you think you can take us all on Big Man?” asked another behind them. “Just leave us what you got and nobody gets hurt, right?”

“Sorry gents,” Sigmundurr laughed. “You picked the wrong guy to rob. But I tell you what. You send your best up against me, and if he wins, you can have everything I own! Sound good?”

“Pfft,” the first responded. “If you’re dead we’ll take it anyway.”

“Well, there’s still my two friends you’ll have to contend with.”

“What, kobolds? Fuck man, you’ve taken leave of your senses. I could snap one of their scrawny necks with my left hand! Look, you look like you might be alright. But you can’t take us all on, and I’d hate to hurt one of your little scaly ‘friends’ in the scuffle.” said the man behind them, and Kreet noticed they were approaching.

“What, now you’re threatening to hurt my kobold slaves? You guys must be really stupid. I can buy two more back in the Underdark tomorrow,” Sigmundurr laughed, and kicked Kallid to the ground behind him. Kreet looked back to Sigmundurr angrily as her husband got back up.

Sigmundurr looked at Kreet. “Oh, now what, you guys going to rebel on me too?”

“No master!” she said, finally getting the ruse.

“Fuck this,” the guy in front said. “Come on guys. Let’s cut the fat guy down to size.”

Suddenly they all charged in. Kallid pulled Kreet to the side away from the impending melee, almost instinctively. The bandits paid them no attention, but she took aim at one of the men coming at Sigmundurr from behind. Not a Guiding Bolt this time though. She’d not had time to consider her options, and still hadn’t learned any new spells since rising to the third clerical level, but she knew the sleep spell and cast it at him.

He crumbled to the ground but the others were charging and didn’t notice, and then all five remaining bandits were on Sigmundurr.

Kreet readied another spell but couldn’t be sure she wouldn’t hit Sigmundurr.

Then Eilistraee arrived.